Do Results Matter?

Yet another attempt at a faster 5K, and the result was essentially the same as the prior ones.  I can't seem to go any faster, despite my training and effort.  Today's effort actually felt pretty damn hard.  The result, however, was almost exactly the same.  Does the result matter? I always say that it's all about the journey, yet I've been trying to achieve a certain result.  I think it's time to let go of the concept of a result.  It may actually be time to do a 5K with no data whatsoever.  And it's probably time to let go of the idea of hitting a certain number.  Running a 5K should be about the feeling of running a 5K.  In that, I succeeded today.  This was hard, and it hurt.  But I didn't run any faster.  Go figure.  I never felt like I gave up, or that I purposely slowed down.  I tried to keep my pace steady, and not slow down too much on the short rollers.  I kept my breathing at every 4th step for the first half mile, and probably let it come up to every 3rd step by the end of the first mile.  The really focused on being in the moment during the second mile.  I didn't think about the next mile or the pain, and I just tried to maintain my pace.  I did slow down to near 8 minute pace on the climb to the turnaround, while noticing that my left shoelace was coming undone.  Right at the turnaround, it came undone, and I had to stop, bend over and retie my lace.  That was not easy at the halfway point of a 5K.

While breathing relatively hard, and my fingers stumbling, I tied my shoe, though it took me about 25 seconds to do so, and then I was on my way again.  After the turnaround it was a gradual downhill, though I'm not sure I really noticed, my pace settling in around 7:20.  At the end of the second mile, my time was 7:56, although in actuality, I had done the mile in ~7:31.  One more mile to go, and it was all guts.  One of my friends later told me that there was a headwind on the way back, although I never really noticed.  I was definitely hurting.  It felt hard, and I was focused on not giving into the discomfort.  The first part of the last mile was uphill, and my pace slipped to about 8:20-8:30.  I suppose that I felt it, but was trying not to notice and continued to try to push.  My breathing was hard, although I don't think I ever went into every 2nd step breathing. That's something to think about in the future.  I just tried to keep running hard, avoiding any negative thoughts.

Despite a gradual downhill over the last half of the third mile, my pace never picked up.  It barely went under 8 minute pace, although I was finally able to go faster during the last 200m to the finish, where I managed to get down to 7:20 pace.  I crossed the finish line, feeling like I'd given it my full effort today.  24:10, and second in my age group.  The guy who beat me, did so by over a minute, so nothing to wonder about.  I was passed by two guys while I tied my shoe, and was never able to catch them.  One of them, I did catch with about a half mile to go, but he passed me back and I didn't have the legs to stay with him. In retrospect, an opportunity missed to hang with someone despite the discomfort.

Do results matter?  I suppose another second place in the age group is good.  Unfortunately, or fortunately, at my age, waking up and getting to the starting line will get me on the podium of most 5K's.  But it's not really about the results.  It's about the effort.  It's about embracing the discomfort and pain and enjoying the experience.  That's the only result that matters.