Journey to Kona Day 26: Streak

I woke up early today, my back was still a little sore, my legs a little tired, knowing I had an early plane to catch. I also knew that sometime before midnight tonight I needed to run. Just a mile, that’s the promise I made to myself 32 days ago.  At least one mile every day. It’s not about fitness, although it certainly doesn’t hurt to run one mile. It’s about mentally knowing that I will run today. I will run every day. That knowledge, one that I want to have in every cell and every fiber of my being, will be with me in 32 weeks when I step off the bike at Kona. Twenty six miles already has become a routine concept to me. My “twenty by twenty” (twenty straight weeks of twenty mile runs); having completed a 100 mile event; the distance is not the challenge. The “streak” is another metaphor. I will run today, tomorrow, and every day hence. Regardless of anything that might seem to be an impediment.

Originally, I figured that I would run in the evening, after my trip to Sacramento and back. But, alas, I awoke early. An opportunity to get my one mile in right away. So, in the dark, with a light drizzle, I departed. My focus on keeping a high cadence, the metronome on my watch beeping. My focus on the ground in front of me, missteps of the past remembered so as not to repeat them. The half mile point, time to turn around...but, let’s go a little further. If I’d had more time, I’m not sure how far I would’ve run today. But adding a few more minutes to my run allowed me to warm up enough to do a few short, fast efforts to get the blood flowing and my hear rate up, not to mention the positive impact on my metabolism.

My streak continues, having reached 32 days. In all of my years of running, I’ve never had such a streak. While 1.25 miles isn’t a lot, especially for someone who completed a 100 mile event, the purpose and meaning of the streak can transcend the actual distance. Successfully completing an Ironman requires running when you’d rather be it bed with your feet elevated. I’m already not phased by the distance, I aim to not be phased by the simple concept of running on tired legs under whatever conditions and circumstances challenge me. Hence, the streak. I’m also trying to develop similar streaks when it comes to writing daily (not applicable to my ironman racing, but definitely of value in regards to other aspects of my life), and meditating every day (applicable to everything!).

Journey to Kona Day 25: Trust

Trust. What a word. I am a trusting person. I trust that people around me are good to their word.  I trust that when someone makes a commitment, that they’ll keep it.  I trust that people aren’t just out for themselves.  I’m not always right.  I certainly ran into this issue in a big way last year and it absolutely overturned my world.  It brought doubt to who I am and what I stand for.  I began to wonder if I could trust myself.  But, I realized that trusting myself is the most important trust that I can have.  I believe in who I am and what I stand for. If others aren’t trustworthy, that’s on them.

The company that removed the mold from my new house breached my trust.  It’s not too surprising, especially having met the person responsible.  If there’s one thing that I know as a clinician is that I’m actually pretty good at reading people.  I’m just not good at listening to what I read.  In this case, it didn’t really matter, I didn’t have much of a choice when I realized that these people weren’t trustworthy.  It will hopefully change the way I choose people to do work for me.  

My wife actually has a pretty good bead on finding trustworthy people to do work for us.  Over time, she’s weeded out the less than trustworthy people.  I, on the other hand, would give them too many chances.  I need to learn.  So, today I’m standing my ground.  The people who are tying to take advantage of me are not going to find someone who will roll over.  They’re going to have to back off.  And I will hopefully learn to be more circumspect in the future.

It’s unfortunate that there are people who will let greed overtake their ethics.  In many cases they probably convince themselves that what they’re doing is ok.  I had this happen to me last year in another setting.  I’m really not very good at this, am I?  Ironically, my willingness to trust others makes others trust me.  That’s the advantage of being too trusting.  The disadvantage is that some people will take advantage of you.  At the end of the day, however, those people have to live with themselves.  I’m sure that they do, but I have to hope that it won’t turn out to their benefit in the long run.

The only person that I need to trust is myself.  And that’s what I’m going to keep doing.

Journey to Kona Day 24: Silent Stress

My coach reminded me that stress can come in many forms.  While doing a hard workout can cause obvious physical stress, which brings on physiological responses.  On the other hand, life stressors are not benign.  We’re in the process of moving to a new house and selling ours right now, and that creates its own stresses on a daily basis.  Being attuned to my internal hormonal balance from all of my ironman training, I am acutely aware of the impact of this type of stress.  I think that I tend to notice it even more when I’m deep into my ironman training, as I am now.

Another kind of stress that my coach pointed out to me is less obvious.  I’m an admitted workaholic, and when I’m meeting with someone, or giving a speech, I really get into it!  It’s exciting, and often gratifying.  It also brings about a release of adrenaline, which is its own stressor.  This is something that I really need to pay more attention to. Next week I’ll be going to Atlanta for a four day meeting.  I really enjoy these meetings, and I tend to get up early, go to bed late, and stay busy the entire time in between.  I often don’t “feel” tired, but the silent release of adrenaline is what’s keeping me going.  The constant stressor has an impact that I really shouldn’t ignore.

In talking to my coach, I realized that the key to this type of stress, the silent stress, is meditation.  I’ve been negligent in my use of meditation, except as I meditate during a workout.  This is ok, but it’s a different type of meditation.  Meditation is a critical means of combatting work and life stressors, and just as I’ve been working on my daily run and writing habit, it’s time to work on my daily meditation habit!

Journey to Kona Day 23: Swim Form

Over the past couple of years my ironman swim times have slowed down.  The number one reason is that I haven’t been swimming!  I’ve always prided myself on my form, and my slow times have probably been a mixture of less swim volume and less attention to proper form.  So, I took my first swim lesson in several years, and I’m excited!

The good news is that my balance is still pretty good, but my rotation, hand entry, and hand position in the water need some work.  The best news is that these are three things I can remember and focus on.

The coming weeks are going to be about doing tons of drills!  Yay:), a little “boring,” but they will get me to my ultimate goal of a faster ironman swim.  They might also get me to some other swim pacing goals.  I haven’t really given much thought to my 100 yard swim times, but after swimming a couple of 100’s in ~1:21 yesterday, before I learned what I can improve, who knows how much I can improve my 100 time?  

Swim form is like the other things I’m working on in life. Regular meditation, running every day, maintaining focus on the important things.  Function will follow form and so will my swim!

Journey to Kona Day 22: Fatigue

Today completes my first four weeks of training on my way to Kona, with a stop halfway in Boulder.  There’s one thing that everyone training for an ironman knows, and that’s fatigue.  If you don’t feel fatigued, you’re not training enough.  There are fine lines, however, as it is possible to overtrain and cause oneself too much fatigue.  This was a pretty hefty week, with nearly 20 hours of training.  After completing 3 hours of cycling today, I went for a run.  My legs felt fine, but I was tired, so I decided to bag the run after two miles.  I’m not concerned about my ability to run off the bike, and my legs actually felt good today.  What I need to be careful of is pushing too hard, too soon.  My first four weeks of training consisted of weeks with 10, 11, 15 and now 20 hours of training.  That’s a pretty steep ramp up, but I’ve been careful not to do too much intensity.  My body can absorb the volume.  This is my main goal over the next six week anyway, and now isn’t the time to mess that up!

After today’s workouts I took a nap, which helped, but still felt like spending the afternoon on the couch.  That is also the challenge of ironman training fatigue, it affects your brain as well, and mine didn’t really feel like doing too much.  My wife was tired today, so my fatigue didn’t really have an impact on our lives.  That’s the other balance point that is always essential in the ironman training sphere.  Life is still around, it’s not all about ironman. Really!

Fatigue is the friend of an ironman.  It’s necessary if you’re going to adequately prepare yourself.  It’s important to become used to biking and running on tired legs.  Most important is running on tired legs and even more important for me (and others) is not allowing ones legs to get too tired during the bike ride.  Which is why I’m avoiding too much intensity while cycling and running, although I allowed myself some intensity on the bike yesterday and today.  I can’t help myself!

I’ve got 15 weeks before Ironman Boulder and 32 weeks before Kona.  I’ll need to get used to living with the fatigue and using it to make me stronger and fitter. This is just the beginning.

Journey to Kona Day 21: Central Governor

Jens Voight is famous for his internal messaging of “shut up legs.”  It’s his way of overriding his central governor.  I got to test this today.  Before starting my day’s workouts I’d trained nearly 11 1/2 hours already this week.  Most of my training has been pretty low key and my fatigue level wasn’t that high, despite spending five hours driving yesterday on what turned out to be a training “rest day.”  I started the morning with a one mile run, to get my legs moving and my run streak kept intact.  I then swam nearly an hour as part of a masters swim.  Then it was on to my first outdoor bike ride this year, a group ride with my try club and several elite young triathletes who are training this winter at my athletic club.  I’ve been pretty happy with how my cycling has come along over the last few weeks, but didn’t know what to expect.

I’ve been trying to keep my cycling relatively low key and volume focused.  Putting in too much intensity could negatively impact my quest to significantly increase my bike volume.  This was supposed to be a pretty “chill” ride today, but it turned out not quite to be that way.  It was interesting how the ride evolved.  Leaving Westlake is flat for the first mile or so, and I felt fine, but then there’s a short climb into the Lake Sherwood area. I haven’t done any climbing yet this year, and immediately I found myself struggling significantly.  We got back on Portrero for another flat section.  I’d already fell into the back group and decided to take it relatively easy until we hit the next climb coming out of Hidden Valley.  I felt a little better on the climb, although it still seemed relatively hard.  The group reorganized after the descent, so we were all together again.  

Before I knew it, we were descending towards Port Hueneme.  I’m still pretty careful on descents, especially ones with switchbacks.  I was falling behind again, but made up some speed towards the bottom, where the road straightens out.  For some reason, I decided to increase my effort, and managed to pass a few of the elite triathletes (who were riding very easily by the way).  I did this on purpose, as we had one short steep “kicker” to deal with, which I attacked as hard as I could, probably hitting 400w.  My legs had started to feel better as well, which was interesting.  Coming down to the final stretch of road, one of the elite triathletes passed me and I got onto his wheel and in his slipstream, where I focused on staying for the next several minutes.  I was going nearly 25 mph, and I’m sure that my wattage was solid.  I was starting to wonder where I had gotten this new found energy.

I managed to stay with the front group until the turnaround in Port Hueneme, but chose to stay towards the back on the return and just take it easy.  Unfortunately, the folks cycling with me were taking it even easier than I was trying to do, so I began “bridging” to the folks in front of me.  This led to an hour of very solid cycling.  When I had finally bridged toward the front, I got on Steve’s wheel and held it.  I didn’t have much more to give, but it would have been easy for me to slow down and take it easy.  For some reason, I was just not prepared to listen to my body today.  I was determined have a solid ride.  But I still had 22 miles to go, which would take over another hour.  At this point, I was in a group of five, and I was determined to hold their wheels.  There were some hills left to climb, and somehow I’d found my climbing legs.  I have no idea where that came from, some of it may have been my legs warming up, and some of it may have been my mind making a decision as to how I was going to proceed.  

With each successive hill, I kept persevering.  As we got near Westlake there was one last short climb to hit.  Once again, despite the fact that I was fatigued, and had been on my bike for nearly 4 hours of solid riding, I attacked this last hill.  Ignoring my central governor, I’m sure that I once again hit a high wattage for the short climb.  I had read about this phenomenon before, despite feeling fatigued, one can ignore that fatigue and force their legs to go all out once again.  

Tomorrow when I get on my bike in the morning for another long ride, I’ll know whether I pushed too hard today.  But it’s ok, it felt great to push it!

Journey to Kona Day 20: Where's the Pony?

For some reason, I am easily unsettled some days.  I don’t think that I was like this when I was fully consumed with work.  I know that having daily structure is essential to honing in on ones purpose, and embracing the structure is critical.  I do find that jumping on the bike, going out for a run, or jumping into the pool all help settle whatever level of unease that I am experiencing.  The feeling of being unsettled may come from different sources.  Sometimes it typical life surprises, usually one that are unexpected and potentially concerning.  Since we recently bought a house and are in the process of selling our present one, these types of “surprises” seem pretty commonplace and almost expected.  In fact, I have found that I’m sometimes able to positively turn some of these surprises around and find some type of silver lining in them.  That’s actually been consistent with who I am.  One of my friends and mentors once told me that if I walked into a room full of horse manure, I’d ask, “where’s the pony?”

I was unsettled yesterday by something that was actually very flattering.  I’m not sure what unsettled me more, the fact that there would be some financial impact of it, which in the big scheme of things probably isn’t significant, or that I was being given credit for my passionate efforts to advance the field that I’ve dedicated my life to over the past four decades.  The financial question fascinates me.  I think that most people would agree that financial issues seem to be the major cause of life stresses.  Ironically, I’ve found that once one has money, there is a unique stress associated with maintaining some level of wealth and security.  This is balanced by the stress of deciding what to do with such resources. I’m always embarrassed to talk or write about such things, but I suppose that’s the purpose of this blog.  

Those of us who do ironman make a financial commitment.  The cost of registration, hotel, and travel is not insignificant.  For many of us, investing in our bicycles is often a rather expensive endeavor.  On the other hand, the time we spend swimming, biking and running will often keep us from spending time and money on other vices!  We live in a very material world, which is one of the things I like about the ironman lifestyle.  While it does have cost associated with it, the purpose is one of fitness and health and embracing the concept of being in the moment.  In this regards, I think I am envious of the professional triathlete, though I know I could never do that I have too many other things I’m passionate about to focus solely on my own person all of the time.  And that brings me back to how we decide how we spend our money.  Do we spend it on ourselves, our children, others?  How much is enough?  I’ve met people who will never be satisfied with having enough money.  I try to understand that mentality, but it really makes me uncomfortable because what people have to do in order to always be focused on making more money seems to inevitably cross ethical boundaries.

And so I write.  Letting our thoughts and feelings out, either while writing a blog, or thinking while we run, bike or swim, can be therapeutic.  I will continue to look for the pony!

Journey to Kona Day 19: Flashback

Earlier this week I met some young elite triathletes at my health club.  They’re training there this winter.  In speaking to them, I realized that I knew one of them from when I lived in Colorado.  In fact, I had raced against him a couple of times and actually beat him.  Of course, that was ten years ago, and he was 13 years old!  That brought back memories of my best race ever.  In 2008 I entered a race called Tri4Me.  I went back and found my comments in my training logs and thought that I’d allow myself a little flashback.  It was late April, 2008, an it was cold out, right around 32 degrees.  The swim was indoors at the Montclair Recreation Center.

“Felt pretty good this morning.  Minimal warm up allowed, able to get in only about 50m.”  There were four of us in each lane, and our start was staggered.  George Dallam, one of the best in my age group at the time, and the author of a triathlon training book, was in the lane next to me and started 10 seconds before me.  This will matter later on.  “Focused on form throughout swim, kept effort moderately hard, never felt like I was redlining it, kept ~1:30 pace/100 METERS (yes, per 100 meters);  felt fine coming out of water, tried to put arm warmers on, but arms wet, so decided not to.  Good Transition.  Bike was pretty technical, with lots of turns, very windy, very cold, kept wattage ~200-220 when I could, last lap (4 lap course), definitely kept wattage up over 220 a good portion, again when not turning or slowing down, or trying to keep from getting blown over, HR was 150-154 throughout the bike.  Normalized Power=188, but hard to judge due to lots of slowing down on the turns and winds.  Got to T2, found out I was 30 seconds behind the guy in front of me (George Dallam, one of the top men in my age group, he beat me by 5 minutes at the Fall Frenzy last year!), he started 10 seconds before me, but I still wanted to catch him, got him in my sights within the first 400 and then gradually reeled him in, drawing even after about 1 1/4 miles, he tried to push me on the uphill, but actually, it wasn't hard for me to stay with him.  Every time he started to push, so did I.”

I remember this like it was yesterday.  I’d never felt this way before, and never have since.  I felt invincible, like there was no way he could run faster than me.  I don’t know where that strength came from, but it felt awesome.  It had also started to snow at this time, making for a very surreal triathlon!

“What I didn't do was try to push him.  One reason was that I knew that I had a 10 second cushion, and that if I finished with him, I had him beat.  In retrospect, from a racing perspective, it would have been interesting to try to push the pace on him rather than react to him.  That said, I sprinted at the end, got a step on him, but so did he (with longer legs) and he edged me by a nose (literally!) at the finish line.  It was cold, my fingers were numb and blue, and my feet were numb, but that didn't stop me on the run.  My HR stayed between 150 and 155 on most of the run, not sure if affected by cold (<40 1="" 2nd="" 3rd="" 4th="" 5="" 75="" 7th="" 8="" 8th="" a="" account="" age="" ahead="" amount="" and="" another="" as="" at="" beat="" bike="" but="" by="" came="" cold="" comparison="" conditions="" consistent="" dealing="" degrees="" didn="" do="" down.="" effort="" energy="" even.="" fall="" fastest="" field="" finished="" first="" fish="" for="" frenzy="" good="" group.="" guy="" hard="" him.="" him="" how="" however="" hr="" i.e.="" i="" in="" is="" it="" judge="" just="" kept="" know="" m="" me="" minutes="" much="" my="" nbsp="" obsessive="" obviously="" of="" on="" only="" overall="" people="" place="" pretty="" probably="" purposes="" put="" race:="" race="" real="" realize="" relation="" run.="" said="" second="" several="" significant="" slower="" span="" speed.="" spent="" swim="" t="" terms="" that="" the="" there="" throughout="" to="" today.="" today="" too="" took="" tremendous="" very="" was.="" was="" wattage="" well="" were="" who="" wind="" with="" yes="" young="">

I remember wanting to get the feeling that I had that day back, but really haven’t done that.  I was clearly in the zone.  That concept is real, and I will vouch for it.  As I work on getting back into shape and top fitness, it’s good to flashback to this day and to visualize how I felt.  Maybe one day in the future I can get into a similar zone!

Journey to Kona Day 18: Some Things Never Change

I was looking back at blogs I wrote over 10 years ago and realized how some things never change!  I wrote about knowing my body, dealing with stress, and all of the challenges that seem to be part of life.  At the time, it seemed that I was figuring these things out, but I look back and wonder if I was really paying attention.  Why? Because I seem to be figuring out the same things just 10 years later.  My wife says that I don’t know how to slow down, and she’s absolutely right.  I tend to have one gear, and that’s all in.  I will push until I can’t, and at that moment, I’ll crash.  Ironically, I remember metaphorically evaluating my bicycle crash in 2009 as a message that I needed to slow down.  I don’t want or need another bike crash to remind me of this.  And so I blog.  This may be one of the major positives of blogging regularly.  It is a way to get thoughts out onto “paper,” and hopefully remember them.

Today was an interesting day.  I’ve been intermittently finding myself anxious lately, which isn’t surprising as we’ve bought a new house, selling our home, figuring out what to do with my life, and training for Kona.  Some days I wake up feeling anxious or “off,” and today was one of those days.  Fortunately, I know what to do. Exercise!  I spent 90 minutes on my bike, focusing on relatively low intensity (I don’t need the added stress of intensity as I’m building my volume). I then ran for a half an hour, also comfortably.  This settled my nerves, but they acted up again in the early afternoon and I was able to go for a short swim before going to the accountant (tax time).  I finished up my training day with another 45 minutes on the bike.  Three days in the week and nearly 9 hours of training.  My goal for the week is 20 hours (last week was 15). Tomorrow and Friday will be a little tough as I’ve got meetings and lots of driving (my wife is right, I need to better pace my scheduling, as I have the problem of putting too much on my plate).  

So, some things never change.  In looking at my first blogs over ten years ago, I mentioned low back soreness. Wow!  I’ve fought this for as long as I can remember.  Perhaps my herniated disc will always make me susceptible.  Maybe my body needs an outlet to tell me when to slow down.  I don’t know, but sprinkled throughout the last 10 years of training and racing are my low back episodes.  Fortunately, they rarely last more than a few days.  I also wonder whether they’re an outlet for stress.  While my training has gotten back on track, I’m reminded that I need to add meditation to my daily routine.  One thing at a time.  

Journey to Kona Day 17: Writing

I threw down the gauntlet to the nursing home industry today. Having reflected a lot over the last few months I wrote an article that captured my major concern about how nursing home companies operate. I’ve dedicated my life to helping older adults and I’ve learned a lot over the years. I know what works and I know what doesn’t work.  I wanted to write something that could be utilized constructively to help improve the care of frail older adults.  It will be interesting to see the feedback I get from the article, so far it’s been very positive.

I also got a lot of help from friends and colleagues in writing the article.  I often say that everyday I learn how little I know, and so I wanted to get feedback from people I respect as I put this article together.  It went through several iterations, and I restructured it and cut out extraneous parts.  I had a lot to say, but in the end I realized it was better to save some things for future articles.  One of the best suggestions from a friend was to review each paragraph and eliminate things that weren’t consistent with the key message in that paragraph.  That was a great suggestion that really helped my article stay focused.

I’ve now had 17 days of writing, and the daily habit has been a good one.  I’m not overthinking what I’m going to write about, and let it come to me each day.  No pressure.  My training continue to go great and I had my weekly phone call with my coach today.  The next six weeks will be focused on increasing my cycling volume.  I’ll write about that tomorrow.

Journey to Kona Day 16: A Busy Retirement

My wife and daughter tease me that I’m a very busy retiree.  It seems to them that I have meetings and phone calls nearly every day.  They’re right!  One thing I know for sure.  Keeping busy and maintaining purpose is critical to staying both mentally and physically healthy.  There are studies that show that purpose can stave off the symptoms of Alzheimer’s Disease!  I know that this morning I woke up feeling a bit off emotionally, which happens to me every so often these days.  Ultimately, I just went for a five mile run along a five mile loop, which meant that once I got half way through it, I was committed to the whole 5 miles.  By the time I finished this easy run, the “off” feeling was gone, and I was ready for a swim.  I had a lunch meeting for a possible business relationship and then nearly 2 hours of phone calls related to a variety of projects I’m involved with.  I try to walk during my phone calls, which today led to an additional 6 miles of walking!  My legs were already fatigued from 15 hours of training last week, so the walking was good from a circulatory perspective, but also added some valuable volume of moving forward to my bodies training.  This is just Monday.  Hopefully, the beginning of another solid week of both life and training!  

I love to share that this is my third attempt at retirement, and that I’ve “failed” the first two attempts.  The key is that we never truly retire, we just adjust our focus.  In fact, having something to focus on is the key!  If you don’t have something to focus on, you’ll tend to feel lost, or at least I do.  I am finding that my ironman training provides a great base of daily activities that I can focus on.  I’m in pretty regular touch with friends and colleagues talking about the things that matter to me.  Plus, I have some ongoing projects to focus on.  With all of that said, my major purpose will continue to be my grandson.  There’s nothing like having a grandchild, and we will soon be moving to within 5 minutes of him, which will make it easier for me to spend time with him most days.  I want him to know that his grandpa will always be there for him!  That beats anything else I can do in retirement.

Journey to Kona Day 15: Adaptation

The human body is remarkable.  Three weeks ago, I was doubting my ability to fully recover from the 100 miler I did over New Years. I knew that my heart rate was higher than usual, and that running at a slow pace, and cycling at a low wattage, brought my heart rate up.  My coach also talks about how years of base training really help, and I believe that is true.  The body’s ability to adapt is remarkable, especially when it has something to fall back upon.  So, here I was, putting in nearly two hours on my bike to conclude a 15 hour training week.  My legs were tired, and my glutes were sore from yesterday’s uphill and downhill hard run.  Despite that, after  a good warm up on my bike, I was able to go thirty minutes at wattage that is close to my ironman wattage, all the while keeping my heart rate at a relatively reasonable level.  Significant progress in just three weeks, and with Ironman Boulder still 16 weeks away, lots to work with.  I followed up my bike workout with a short 2 mile run to keep my daily run streak alive.  While slow, my heart rate also stayed down, which may have just been due to fatigue, but I’ll take it.

It’s also important to recover from workouts, and Saturday was a pretty solid run day, hence, overall, I tried to keep today pretty tame.  One of the interesting challenges that I will have is that I really want to get in training every day, and in fact, must train every day if I’m going to run every day no matter what.  With that said, training doesn’t mean pounding on oneself.  I’ve found easy cycling to be healthy and I’ve also found walking to be incredibly productive, while at the same time maintaining  a low level of exertion and muscle stimulation.  Finished the day with my grandson and his mommy and daddy, which is a joy!

Journey to Kona Day 14: Ironman Legs

I decided it was time for a longer run today, and ultimately realized that I had an opportunity to run on what I like to call “ironman legs.”  After 3 weeks of solid training, my legs actually are feeling better, but after a 2 mile warm up, I did a hard uphill and downhill run on a one mile hill with 8-10% grade.  The uphill is just hard aerobically, and the downhill is pretty brutal when run hard, which I did by going under 7 minute pace.  I then was able to put an additional 4.5 miles on tired legs that had some soreness to them. That’s what I’m talking about when it comes to “ironman legs.”  It’s really the thing we strive for since the run portion of an ironman is where you can lose the most time.  So, if I can pound on my legs and make them tired and somewhat sore, then realize that I’m running right around 10 minute per mile pace, I’m pretty happy.  That’s what I did today.

I’ve also realized that I really need to get more runs in this year right after biking, the so-called “brick.”  I’m not sure anyone really knows what the term stands for. Is it that your legs feel like bricks, or that doing these workouts are like building a brick wall that will be strong during the run portion of an ironman?  Either way, there is no question as to the value of such workouts in terms of training ones body to be able to keep running at the end of an ironman.

In my quest to always look for the life metaphor in my ironman training, how does today’s workout relate?  Practicing running with your legs are tired and sore is not unlike practicing living ones life when things aren’t going perfectly.  That’s pretty much a constant, because rarely do things go perfectly.  I’ve had my own struggles the past few months, and I think I find my best outlet with hard workouts and training.  It also keeps me focused on a goal that I can get my head around.  Having been in Kona this past October to cheer my friend Robert on, and to have had the opportunity to run on most of the course, I can start visualizing how it will feel on race day.  Visualization works best when you can simulate how you’ll probably feel.  And so it goes.  

Since I started training for ironman 10 years ago, running on tired, “ironman legs,” has always been one of my favorite workouts. As I prepare for Boulder in 16 weeks, and Kona in 34, nothing has changed in this regard.  Approximating the feel of the run leg of an ironman is good training, but even better visualization!

Journey to Kona Day 13: Transparency

One of my friends and colleagues once told me that I can be scary transparent. I have a tendency to be honest to a fault.  People see this transparent honesty as genuine and sincere, as they should.  The scary part, as I understand fully is that this level of honesty and transparency is not always easily to handle.  Not everyone wants to deal with the truth, and not everyone is ready for it.  When I was younger, as in just a couple of years ago, I think that I might at times be too straightforward in sharing my unfiltered thoughts, which could have it’s downside.

In the late 1990’s I was President of GeriMed, a geriatric medical management company.  We were discussing a deal with Humana, which would have had us bring our geriatrics model to some of their Medicare managed care markets.  We met in their corporate office with one of their executives, Bruce Perkins.  I told him that single disease state disease management programs were worthless (which, by the way, the were), and that the proper approach to disease management in older adults was the geriatrics model.  What I didn’t realize was that he was the person behind all of Humana’s disease management programs.  Needless to say, our development person didn’t talk to me for weeks, as I lost any chance of making a deal with Humana due to my honesty.  

On the other hand, being honest and transparent has helped me be a successful leader.  People who work for me know that what I tell them is true.  When I empower people, they know that it’s real.  Like everything, there are good and bad aspects to this.  I realize that having confidence in people who work for me can give them confidence.  That’s wonderful, but if somehow my confidence is misplaced or inaccurate, I can be leading folks down the wrong path.  Of course, that’s life, and we can’t be responsible for all of the unknowns in life.  

One thing that I know for sure.  When you have confidence in people, and you share that confidence in a sincere and transparent manner, those people will follow you anywhere!  Of course, they might follow you over a cliff.  Or, they will follow you to the top of the mountain.  There is one thing that is certain.  When you’re honest and transparent, people know who you are and what they’re getting.  I’ll take that over any alternative consequences every day of the week.

Journey to Kona Day 12: Habits

My father taught me that doing something for 21 straight days builds a habit.  I had a busy day today, so it took some effort to get my 1 mile of running in this afternoon.  I’ve now run for 18 straight days.  I’m doing this for a few reasons.  From a training perspective, there’s no rational benefit of running every single day.  But that isn’t my purpose or my goal.  Running has ultimately been my challenge at the end of an ironman.  Not a huge challenge, as I usually finish an ironman in about the same place as I’m in when I start my run.  My last two races are exceptions based on illnesses and training, but if I’m adequately trained I don’t do too bad on the run.  With that said, I want to do better.  Since I know I can run long, and mentally I’m good with that, it just seems that getting the idea of running every single day locked into my brain might be helpful.  Hence, my daily running streak started 18 days ago.  I’ve committed that between now and Kona, I will run at least one mile every day.  Today was one of those “test” days.  

In running only one mile on a day like today, which for all practical purposes was a rest day for me.  Everything I did was light and easy (walking and a little easy spin on the bike).  I didn’t want to “just” run one mile, I needed a specific goal and purpose for that mile.  I’ve been working on my run cadence, which used to be about 160 foot strikes per minute, and I’ve been trying to increase that number to 170-175.  The science behind that has to do with having less time with one’s foot touching the ground.  Plus, most elite runners are closer to 180.  

I tend to struggle keeping my cadence up when I’m running slow or easy, so today, having only time to run a mile, I focused solely on having more rapid turnover.  I succeeded.  I ran my mile at about a 9:30 pace, but managed a cadence of 184 foot strikes per minute.  My breathing was higher than usual, and if I wore a heart rate monitor, I’m sure my HR would have been higher than what I’m used to when running at this pace.  That’s because I was doing something that my body wasn’t used to and was uncomfortable doing.  But that was kind of the idea.  It’s always good to do things that take you out of your comfort zone, and it takes work to change ones form, which is ultimately necessary if your increasing your cadence at lower paces.  

I few years ago, I worked on increasing my cadence and had some success, but my lack of training in the last year really caused me to slip back in to my more slogging habits.  Over the past few weeks, I’ve been steadily increasing my cadence closer to 170.  Today was the first time I’ve every gone about 180 while running relatively slowly.  It will be interesting to see what comes of this.  

More importantly, I motivated myself to my 18th straight day of running.  Three more days and my habit will officially be locked into place!

Journey to Kona Day 11: Envisioning

My wife woke up today pondering the concept of envisioning.  We all spend too much time envisioning our futures.  They are packed with expectations of what is going to happen.  The same view bleeds into our past as we reflect on what could have been.  We can no more change our past than we can predict our future.  We can only really deal with the present.  Life once again imitates ironman, where these concepts are critical for survival.  We spend too much of our lives worrying.  I’m pretty sure that worrying is unhealthy.  Fight or flight is one thing.  When we have an emergent situation, we need the surge of adrenalin to deal with the circumstance.  But when these same hormones are released constantly due to worrying, they cannot be helpful or healthy.  

There is no value in putting pressure on ourselves to achieve specific goals.  The key is to apply the effort and to try.  That’s all that we can ever do.  Results come one way or another.  Expectations really don’t help.  The very term, expectation, provides the clue.  If we spend our time in expectation, it detracts us from the effort and energy needed to focus on actually accomplishing something.  One of the things that I’ve learned over the years doing ironman is that spending time worrying or questioning my decisions during a race will actually sap me of needed energy.  The most important thing one can do during an ironman is to conserve all the energy you can.  It starts in the morning of a race.  Spending time worrying about the race, allowing oneself to get too cold in transition, spending too much time on ones feet, all of these things use energy that will be needed during the very long day.

Life is no different.  We need to conserve our energy, and not waste it on needless and unnecessary energy expenditures.  That includes worrying, overthinking (my number one weakness), and envisioning.  There’s a difference between envisioning and visualizing.  Visualization is a tool that I have found to be very effective in triathlon, but also in life.  Practicing what we’re going to do allows us to prepare neural pathways so that they can be more effectively utilized.  Visualization is purposeful. Envisioning is not.  Envisioning is about hoping how things will work out, when in fact, we just don’t know.  We’re better off just focusing on being in the moment. It’s really the only time that matters.

Journey to Kona Day 10: Listen to your Body

My coach reminded me today of the value of listening to one’s body and knowing when you’re ready.  Our conversation was focused on cycling and running, but I immediately realized what it meant on another level.  Ever since I quit my job in November, I’ve been lost.  Something has been missing and I’ve been looking for it.  My coaches reminder today made me realize that I just have to wait for it to come to me, which it has been starting to do as of late.  

I have an opportunity later this week to share my thoughts on what it takes to effectively educate doctors, nurse practitioners and physician assistants on how to deliver person centered care.  This feels right to me. It’s something that I’ve both talked about and actually done over the years.  It’s sorely needed in a healthcare system that tends to focus on how many patients one can see in a day, or on how much money one can make performing a procedure or selling a product.  It’s easy to sit down and write about it, and I know it will be even easier to stand up in front of a group and talk about it!  

I’ve also continued to procrastinate on my book project, which is also along the lines of promoting the approach to caring for older adults that I’ve lived for the past thirty years.  The reason for this has been more complex. I know that this is what I want to do, but I actually think that I’ve been afraid to move forward.  Fear is not something that is typically in my vocabulary.  Yet, the fear will dissipate when it’s the right time, and that time is now.  

On the triathlon front, my body has been telling me a lot in the past week.  While the bulk of my training will invariably have to be at a level of intensity that allows me to put in a high volume of work, I usually want something more. My coach recognizes this and will allow me to sprinkle in some of the intense workouts that I crave.  I really do seem to like putting myself through painful training and racing.  In some ways, that is why my favorite race is probably a 5K.  There’s nothing, to me at least, like finishing a 5K in extreme discomfort, to the point of feeling like I’m about to throw up or pass out.  I can achieve this feeling at the end of an ironman, and have achieved it on a few occasions.  Ironically, I found myself in this zone near the end of my recent 100 mile event.  It will be interesting to see what I decide to do next year in terms of training, based on my predilection towards intensity.

In the meantime, I’ll stick to accessing pain in my training and racing, rather than in life!  I think that it’s far healthier to feel pain through extreme exercise, rather than by achieving it through emotional distress brought on by conflict in the work environment.  It’s funny, I used to say that I wanted to become a high school chemistry teacher when I retired.  Since I’ve forgotten chemistry, I think I’ll just look for opportunities to teach the things that are important to me.  It feels like the right time to do this.

Journey to Kona Day 9: Knowing Your Body

I’m an admitted data geek when it comes to my training.  When I first decided to run, in the early 90’s, I bought a book on heart rate monitoring.  It’s still pretty accurate!  I bought one of the early Polar HRM’s and haven’t looked back since.  I’ve had anaerobic threshold testing done by Neal Henderson himself and done countless Conconi’s (a testing routine that correlates running pace/cycling power with HR) myself for both my bike and run.  What have I learned?  

At the end of the day, it’s still about knowing your own body. Everyone wants a formula to tell them exactly what to do, but being a geriatrician has taught me one thing.  No two people are alike.  The “average” person represents a broad range of dots on a graph, and should only be used to get oneself in the ballpark.  But, I still love data!  My wife makes fun of me when I enter my results into Training Peaks at the end of each workout.  

It’s always interesting to see how the data responds after some time off from training, which I’ve just had on multiple levels.  I haven’t really ridden my bike since the early summer, and my run training was solely focused on long distance and endurance through the winter.  Put that together with my recovery over the past month and here I am.

Just two weeks ago, when I started running again, my HR would get high pretty quickly unless I stayed at a slow pace.  In just a couple of weeks, I’ve already gotten closer to my “fit” heart rate zones, showing how quickly the body can respond to training when you’ve got years and lots of miles behind you.  In addition to heart rate, which I actually don’t use that often anymore, I long ago locked onto my breathing pattern while I run.  I can pretty consistently relate my breathing rate to my heart rate zones.  A comfortable effort is associated with breathing every 6 or more steps per breath cycle; Zone 2 breathing tends to be closer to breathing every 4 steps; what is considered “tempo” effort corresponds to breathing every 3 steps.  I’ve used this when doing half marathons, where I keep my breathing at every 4 steps for the first few miles, then let it come up to every 3 steps.  Similarly, a 5K is raced breathing every 3 steps throughout, with an increase towards the end.

I was really pleased with today’s effort, ran one mile very comfortably, increased my effort with the second and third miles and did a hard quarter mile at the end.  Ironically, my running pace for all of these efforts is faster than what I expect to run at ironman. Mentally, that puts me in a very good place right now!  I love the data, but I also love the feeling that I can just listen to my body and it will help me do the right thing.

Journey to Kona Day 8: 34 Weeks

Things are starting to shake out in regards to my plans for Kona this year.  I have 34 weeks until the event, and 17 weeks before Ironman Boulder.  I’ve decided to sign up for Boulder.  Why?  The biggest reason is that I want to give qualifying the old fashioned way a try.  The second is that I love Ironman Boulder, and last year was the only one that I’ve missed since it came into being.  My place at Kona is locked in by virtue of my 13 ironman’s which have gotten me a “Legacy” spot. However, I am racing this year as a 60 year old, and I really want to see if I can qualify on my own.  No matter what happens at Boulder, my preparations will help prepare me to be more competitive at Kona.  There’s the rub.  “Competitive” at Kona means attempting to finish in the top half of my age group!  There is no way that I can compete with the top men in my age group.  They will finish close to 2 hours faster than me, even if I have the race of my life.  But that’s not what this is all about. It’s about giving it everything you’ve got.

This week was my second 10+ hour week of training in a row.  It’s tempting to do too much, but I’m being cautious about increasing my training volume.  On a positive note, my running pace is only about 30-45 seconds per mile off where I was a few years ago, when I had my best finish at Boulder.  My cycling is also quickly coming up to speed, which is encouraging since I literally didn’t ride my bike for 6 months.  It’s always remarkable how much cycling fitness one can maintain with running (and a ton of walking in this case).  My cycling wattage is only about 20-30 watts off of where it has been in the past, and with the proper training over the next month or so, I would expect that to come right back.

Sixty is the new fifty, or maybe even the new forty.  Age is just a number and I intend to keep working to demonstrate that fact.  I often say that I’m fitter than I’ve ever been, but have more aches and pains.  My low back will attest to that, but it seems to be surviving.  I definitely need to get an adequate amount of rest, and pay attention to that as a priority.

My biggest surprise this week was getting into the pool and kicking 1100 yards straight with a kickboard.  I’ve never done that in my life!  I have to attribute that to my 100 miler and the training that went into it. It’s pretty remarkable how much the leg training translates.  Also, my coach has encouraged me to work on my kick insofar as it will translate to my swim in Kona.  I’ve been reading about the value of kicking in regards to one’s swim, and there are various schools of thought.  The most important seems to be using ones kick to maintain balance and help with overall positioning in the water. My instincts tell me that continuing to work on my kick will help bring my swim back to where it used to be.  I’ve actually been feeling pretty good in the water.

Let’s see what the coming week brings.  I think that by the end of the week I’ll have an even better idea as to where I am.

Journey to Kona Day 7: Me and My Back

My back and I go back almost 60 years, but it’s really been the last 20 that we’ve had an on and off relationship. I think it all started somewhere in the early 90s when I was picking up a sack of concrete mix and threw my back out. After that every so often I would do something and my back would seize up on me, but it was never really a big problem and would usually go away after a few days. In 1999 I was rushing to get through a set of squats in the gym when I felt it. It was almost like a hissing sound and I could literally feel my desk herniating. I tried to ignore the problem but I ultimately went to see an orthopedic surgeon who told me that I had a significantly herniated L5-S1 disc.  Ironically, he told me he’d seen a similar situation with a professional hockey player who herniated his desk while reaching into the refrigerator to get a soda. I share that because disks are a funny thing, and what causes them to herniate doesn’t necessarily correspond to a regular exercise program. More on that later. At the time I had been into running marathons, and though I lived in Colorado there weren’t a lot of triathlons in the area at that time. 

My Ironman days were a decade ahead of me, and work had taken on a lot of extra time. So I stopped running and hoped for my back to get better and it didn’t. One day I started feeling tingling down my leg and I called the neurosurgeon’s office in order to make an appointment but they never called me back. I took this as a sign and started running again. That was nearly 20 years ago. To this day my back tightens up or “goes out“ on me every so often. I’ve tried Core exercises, I’ve tried Pilates, I’ve tried all sorts of things. I’ve had chiropractic, I’ve had regular massages. I’ve had acupuncture. I’m sure some of these things actually help, but it’s never been quite clear to me. So, that brings us to this week. In the ramp up to my hundred mile event last month I had my back seize up on me a few times. Since the event I’ve been fine and I’ve started to increase my training. 

Two days ago I was leaning over to pick something up and my low back tightened up on me. I’ve already decided to run every day so the next two days I only did a mile or a mile and a half and it was OK, and today I went out and ran 4 miles and my back’s already improving as it generally does. I did get in the pool yesterday and I’m looking forward to regular swimming which over the years has always been a good stabilizer for my back problems. I’m also generally able to get on my bike and ride, which I did this morning as well.

My favorite back story was at Ironman Chattanooga in 2014, when three days before the race I was reaching over to put on my cycling shoe for a short ride when my low back seized up on me. By race day it felt a lot better but was still a little sore. That was the day I had my PR for an Iron Man. Go figure.

Journey to Kona Day 6: Why I Tri

Watching Julie Moss crawl across the finish line in 1982 is reason enough to want to do an ironman.  The life metaphor of never giving up no matter how many times you fall, no matter how bad you feel, no matter how much circumstances conspire against you, is profound in and of itself.  That is reason enough to complete an ironman, but there are many other reasons.  As a geriatrician I can say that I’ve discontinued more prescription drugs over the course of my career than I’ve started. I’ve told all of my patients that regular exercise transcends prescription drugs and often can replace one or more medications.  I’ve lived that philosophy, and feel, with the age of 60 coming soon, it has definitely benefited me.  I don’t take a single medication. The ironman lifestyle is one that I fully embrace as a very healthy one, both physically and emotionally.

The great thing about triathlons is the variation and total body approach to exercise.  Being someone who has suffered from back problems for many years, swimming provides an important therapeutic approach to being properly aligned and in a state of balance.  There’s also no question that spending time in the water is emotionally healthy, reminding us of our time in the womb.  Swimming is also primarily about technique and is minimally impacted by loss of strength.  I always say that I would lose an arm wrestling match with most old ladies, but I can hold my own during an ironman swim (aside from the wrestling match of a mass start ironman, to be discussed in a later post). 

Cycling is non-weight bearing, and as such doesn’t beat the body up as much, providing a great way to build lower body strength and cardiovascular fitness.  Upper body strength can not be ignored, especially with the importance of staying in an aero position for many hours at a time.  Finally, core strength is a critical component to cycling.  Mentally, anyone who has gone on long bike rides knows the sense of peace that riding through the countryside can bring.  If you want to take cycling to another level, riding with a group not only brings new friends and camaraderie, but a new set of skills required to ride a bicycle in a group.

Running is a natural human experience.  Most people love to run, at least a little.  Just watch a child running.  Running is also a uniquely total body exercise.  It pounds on every part of our being, bringing fitness building capacity to its greatest height.  I didn’t run much when I was young due to childhood asthma.  In fact, the first time I actually ran one mile straight was after I turned 32 years old!  This is another reason why running at least one mile a day right now has a special meaning to me.  While triathlon and ultimately ironman has been my goal since 1982, I actually became a runner first in the 90’s, completing several marathons with the realization that I needed to check that box off before doing an ironman.

I would be remiss if I didn’t mention the transitions.  Triathlon is that unique sport where you can make up time by being obsessive and neurotic when it comes to the transition between disciplines.  I have always considered this to be one of my strengths.  In fact, I don’t know why they don’t give awards to the fastest transitioners!

The other thing I love about triathlons are the people.  I’ve always felt that triathletes were less serious and more well balanced. More well balanced you may ask? Swimming 2.4 miles, biking 112 miles and running 26.2 miles is well balanced? Well, yes it is!  If you prepare yourself well, that is.  I’ve made friends over the years through triathlon, and during the run portion of the ironman I will usually get to know several people.  

Finally, there is the fact that ironman is a metaphor for life.  If something can go wrong, it will.  Staying in the moment is the key not only to successfully completing an ironman, but in enjoying it in the process!  

Journey to Kona Day 5: Harnessing Who We Are

I can be very passionate about the things I believe strongly in.  That passion can be infectious. When I was a boy, I read “Call of the Wild,” by Jack London.  It’s about a dog named Buck, who finds out that he has natural leadership abilities.  Several years ago, I recognized that I had something in common with Buck. When I believe strongly about something, I have the ability to galvanize others to work together for a common good.  This has certainly helped me at various times during my career. Ironically, I realized today that others might recognize this talent and encourage me to use it to benefit them.  I’ve actually had that happen a few times over the years in various settings.  Since I have a tendency to look for the good in people, I might not always see ulterior motives.

Being an optimist and seeing the good in people can be admirable traits, but as I wrote yesterday, they can be traits that bring you directly into the lion’s den.  Since very few things in life are truly black and white, it’s not that hard to end up mistaken about a grey area.  There is not a simple solution or answer to the question that I am proposing here.  It’s more of a warning.  Look at all angles. Recognize that there may be a variety of motives present.  Identify the possible outcomes and implications of one’s actions.

There is a huge responsibility attached to being a natural leader. There are also great opportunities. I’ve written about the fact that I am willing to take risks in order to achieve the greater good. But life is still a balancing act.  Are the risks too great?  One doesn’t often know until after the fact.  If you don’t try, you won’t know the answer.  Once again, the ironman analogies abound. You can push yourself to great heights, but sometimes you push too far and everything comes crashing down.

Switching gears, I only had time for a short run this morning and ran 1.4 miles completely focused on a fast cadence.  I managed to keep close to my goal of 180 steps/minute.  If I keep practicing that, I can hopefully, develop it as a habit that will have a positive impact on my running economy. The discipline to practice that is similar to the discipline I need to have to effectively utilize my leadership skills. 

Journey to Kona Day 4: Entering the Lion's Den

One of my friends and mentors once told me that if I walked into a room full of horse manure, I’d ask, “where’s the pony?”  Optimism mixed with idealism has always been part of who I am.  There is no question that is one of the reasons for many of my accomplishments.  It’s also the same reason for most of my failures. I tend to have a high pain tolerance, and it would seem that I have a similar high tolerance for risks of a certain type.  My one exception is my fear of heights.  I have jumped into a number of business relationships that I might look back upon as mistaken, but I’m often reminded that hindsight is 20:20, and that I have also had success in areas I was warned to avoid.  Perhaps the real question is identifying the high interpersonal risk environment.  How do you know who is telling you the truth?  How does one know what kind of business partner they’re choosing to work with?

How does one avoid the lion’s den?  That’s a question my wife asked me yesterday.  It’s a great question, because I seem to have a tendency to seek out the lion’s den. I’m not sure if there is an ironman corollary, but there probably is, especially after I’ve competed in some of the most difficult ironman races of all time!  Therein lies the message.  If you don’t know how to avoid the lion’s den, at least know how to look for a way out!  I will never forget, as long as I live, being in the middle of a tempest in Sand Hollow Reservoir (during the 2012 Ironman St.George), thinking that someone might die that day, and it wouldn’t be me.  That’s the one constant response in an ironman; slow down, relax, get your wits about  you, take care of your mind and body, and then figure out your plan.

I’ve had plenty of experiences in my life where I’ve walked into the lion’s den.  In fact, I do seem to gravitate in that direction!  In many ways I’ve always been a bit of a risk taker. Skipping the 8th grade, leaving my geriatric fellowship after one year to join Kaiser, leaving Kaiser to open a Senior Health Clinic with GeriMed, leaving GeriMed to go into private practice. Perhaps I shouldn’t be surprised that when I retired for the first time, I quickly jumped into a website business venture, when I retired for the second time, I stepped into the middle of a large nursing home chain, and 8 months later, literally entered the lion’s den that is the inner sanctum of the nursing home industry.  

The interface between business and human nature is the ultimate conundrum.  What drives people?  I know what drives me.  I have devoted my life to helping others.  It’s never been about money, although one must be profitable if they are to sustain a successful program. Or, at least we’re supposed to think that.  Bankruptcy laws might actually provide a counterbalance to this concept, as does the structure of publicly traded companies.  In the 1990’s, most of the publicly traded nursing home chains went into bankruptcy.  Today, many are on the verge.  With that background, as well as my idealistic and optimistic outlook, I jumped in head first.  Perhaps the outcome can be compared to my experience at the Long Course Ironman World Championship in Perth, Australia in 2009.  That was my only DNF, but not for lack of trying.  A bike crash which resulted in a fractured clavicle, pelvis and hip socket forced me to quit after biking for 48 miles and walking 3 1/2 with the aforementioned injuries.  I must be a glutton for punishment.