For some reason, I am easily unsettled some days. I don’t think that I was like this when I was fully consumed with work. I know that having daily structure is essential to honing in on ones purpose, and embracing the structure is critical. I do find that jumping on the bike, going out for a run, or jumping into the pool all help settle whatever level of unease that I am experiencing. The feeling of being unsettled may come from different sources. Sometimes it typical life surprises, usually one that are unexpected and potentially concerning. Since we recently bought a house and are in the process of selling our present one, these types of “surprises” seem pretty commonplace and almost expected. In fact, I have found that I’m sometimes able to positively turn some of these surprises around and find some type of silver lining in them. That’s actually been consistent with who I am. One of my friends and mentors once told me that if I walked into a room full of horse manure, I’d ask, “where’s the pony?”
I was unsettled yesterday by something that was actually very flattering. I’m not sure what unsettled me more, the fact that there would be some financial impact of it, which in the big scheme of things probably isn’t significant, or that I was being given credit for my passionate efforts to advance the field that I’ve dedicated my life to over the past four decades. The financial question fascinates me. I think that most people would agree that financial issues seem to be the major cause of life stresses. Ironically, I’ve found that once one has money, there is a unique stress associated with maintaining some level of wealth and security. This is balanced by the stress of deciding what to do with such resources. I’m always embarrassed to talk or write about such things, but I suppose that’s the purpose of this blog.
Those of us who do ironman make a financial commitment. The cost of registration, hotel, and travel is not insignificant. For many of us, investing in our bicycles is often a rather expensive endeavor. On the other hand, the time we spend swimming, biking and running will often keep us from spending time and money on other vices! We live in a very material world, which is one of the things I like about the ironman lifestyle. While it does have cost associated with it, the purpose is one of fitness and health and embracing the concept of being in the moment. In this regards, I think I am envious of the professional triathlete, though I know I could never do that I have too many other things I’m passionate about to focus solely on my own person all of the time. And that brings me back to how we decide how we spend our money. Do we spend it on ourselves, our children, others? How much is enough? I’ve met people who will never be satisfied with having enough money. I try to understand that mentality, but it really makes me uncomfortable because what people have to do in order to always be focused on making more money seems to inevitably cross ethical boundaries.
And so I write. Letting our thoughts and feelings out, either while writing a blog, or thinking while we run, bike or swim, can be therapeutic. I will continue to look for the pony!
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